I write a lot of posts about the experiences I have on OKC, but I don't write much about the actual dates I go on...

...because they're boring as hell. There's literally nothing to write about other than 1) we met up for a drink, 2) it was awkward, 3) and I never saw him again. The ones who contact me for a second date take the hint after one or two unreturned communication attempts, so I've had no crazy text messages/emails/dick pics to speak of.

I average two dates a month, so I'm never excited about them anymore.

I met up with What's-His-Face #234q3945702394875 the other night and it was the usual shit: forced conversation and me gulping down my beer to take the edge off. This was a Friday night, so I made sure to have plans with a friend afterward so I could make up for what I knew was going to be a mundane experience.

But for once, my date was not mundane...

After some small talk, What's-His-Face and I started talking about the Elliot Rodgers case and the #YesAllWomen campaign. We discussed male entitlement to sex and the fucked up idea men have that, if you stalk a girl hard enough, she'll give in. Besides the fact that he mansplained everything, which is standard when you're talking to men about feminism, I was actually somewhat enjoying our conversation. I was not completely repulsed by him and might have actually considered maybe possibly seeing him again. For me, this was a huge dating win!

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For the first time in a long time, I was actually concerned about what my date thought of me. I was beginning to worry that I was annoying to him and talked too much and that he wouldn't want to go out with me again. I told him that I had to leave to meet up with my friend, so we walked outside...

...where I saw a big, happy bulldog! I asked his owners if I could pet him and they said ok. I love it when my dates end with petting a doggie!

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After petting the doggie, What's-His-Face and I started walking toward my bike...

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...and he grabbed my arm, saying "Come here."

Then he kissed me.

"I know I'm supposed to like this," I thought...this is what society tells women they want...they want a man to "make the first move." This was supposed to feel romantic...

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...but I felt scared...I stiffened up in his arms...There's no way he thought I enjoyed that...

I blurted out "but I thought you thought I was annoying and awkward and talked too much..." I normally don't narrate these types of thoughts to someone I just met, but I was so nervous...I wanted him to go away...

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He said that he thought it was cute that I was awkward...

Cute.

He thought that the quality I hate the most about myself was fucking cute...

I unlocked my bike, put my safety vest and helmet on, hoping that my dorky bike gear would make him not want to kiss me again...

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...but he did it again...I stiffened up like before and gave no indication that I enjoyed it...

According to the James-Lange Theory of Emotion, we label our emotions based on our interpretations of our physiological responses to stimuli.

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Our physiological reactions to a fearful experience or an exciting experience feel very similar - racing heart, shaking. I didn't quite know how to label the emotion I felt when being kissed by a stranger I was somewhat attracted to...

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I was supposed to like it, right? That's why my heart was racing and I was shaking, right?

He said that I had two options: to tell my friend I'd just had an awesome date and that I couldn't make it, or make plans to have another awesome date sometime soon.

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He wanted me to cancel my plans with my friend...

Did I mention this was a first date? I'd just met him two hours before?

I couldn't get away from him fast enough...this was one of those moments where I was infinitely grateful I had a bike...

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I FLEW down Columbus Avenue, adrenaline pumping...I'm pretty sure someone's hat was blown off as I whooshed by...

I showed up to meet my friend, still shaking...she told me I shouldn't go out with someone again who made me feel this ill at ease...

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We downed some yummy cocktails and food, forgetting all about What's-His-Face...

After saying goodnight to my friend, I walked toward my bike...

...and a stranger decided to accompany me.

He came right up to me and my bike, talked at me, asked me how I was doing...I did not acknowledge his presence and continued unlocking my bike and putting my helmet on...

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He eventually went away...

I couldn't imagine a more appropriate ending to my night...yet another reminder of my vulnerability...

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I checked my email when I got home and What's-His-Face had written to me, saying "Sorry. I was tactless."

Yes. Aggressively kissing your date IS indeed tactless, ESPECIALLY after you'd been conversing with her about male entitlement to women's bodies.

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It's sad how a man who had clearly consumed his fair share of feminist literature was unable to apply anything he'd read to his own life.

But he apologized, right? That shows he's learned something...

I'm not willing to find out...those weren't butterflies in my stomach I felt when he kissed me...that was fear...